Jumat, April 01, 2011

the way it is

So i was blogwalking to @leonisecret blog at www.leonisecret.com where on her latest post, she talk about overcoming the difficulties of life, to ignore the bullies and reinvent urself so u can conquer the world and be more confident, menggunakan sesuatu yang kita takuti atau kita anggap sebagai kelemahan dan diubah menjadi kelebihan kita. Its really an inspiring and a well written piece.

Speaking about bullies, it actually remind me of my childhood. Dari dulu gw selalu jadi anak pendiam kesayangan guru. I would always sit in a corner and read something. I was a nerd and i was even wearing a nerd glasses (it wasn't really a trendy thing back then). But i wasn't born that way. I used to be that cheerful popular kid at my first elementary school, but then i transfer school and get depressed cos i just realized that i don't adapt to new environment very well (till this day). Not to mention i got bully at this new school... Makes it even more unbearable. I really don't want to share why i got bullied cos... Damnit its so stupid!

I promise myself that i'll start a new me when i got to middle school. And it went well, actually. I got good grades and active with school organizations. I was a bit stressed out cos i was an alien in elementary school and suddenly i have so many things that i have to do and none of it feels familiar. Thank god i found some friends at middle school.

But than... I have to switch school... Again.

Being an outcast... Again.

Have i told u that i don't adapt well with new environment?

I went to high school with a fresh start, it felt like middle school again. I got good grades and was active at school organization. I didn't switch to another school so i was safe all the way through high school. All the people at my school were very nice, but there was one event that i still remember till this day. It was when telenovela was a big hit, and Betty La Fea was one popular telenovela. It was when an exam where we sit on seperate tables and someone wrote 'Betty La Fea' on my desk. A big joke.

Fyi, i never feel that i'm ugly. I was insecure with myself, yes. But i always know that i'm not ugly. I wasn't mad cos someone wrote 'Betty La Fea' on my desk cos on the telenovela itself, Betty wasn't ugly, she was just untakencare (tidak terurus.red) of. Cos she was poor, she can't afford those fancy clothes and make up the other girls are wearing. She's not ugly, she's just poor.

The story of mylife. I'm not ugly, i'm just poor. I hate bullies cos they just don't get it. They thought that i choose to wear my outfit and glasses that way. Well, don't they know that i do want to wear new freshly made uniforms, not the leftovers from my older sister (who is shorter than me), i do want to wear a nice glasses, not the one which i wore from elementary school cos i'm too poor to buy a new one, i do want to buy new shoes, socks, bags, EVERYTHING, but i CAN'T because i'm THAT poor.

Now, i make my own money. I didn't regret my past cos i am who i am because of my past.

2 komentar:

Anonim mengatakan...

hey people, this Betty La fea isn't a big joke, she is someone. She is young, attractive, and PNS! Dia bahkan ke Malang mau naik pesawaaat men, gw aja ke Jakarta naiknya bus. Itu aja mau nyakar-nyakar dinding rasanya, karena ga rela ngeluarin 230 ribu (matarmaja 50 ribu, duit bulanan saya 300 ribu udah buat beli bensin bayar buku2 kuliah). She is someone now! Bweeek!

Par poor par poor, goblok banget anak SD ngejelekin orang gara-gara pakaian. Aku dulu juga dikira anak tukang becak, dipanggil becak sama orang-orang padahal Bapakku dosen. Jahat! Aduh sumpah emosi...

Pitiful Kuro mengatakan...

"She is young, attractive, and PNS!"